About this blog

"One of the greatest moments in anybody's developing experience is when he no longer tries to hide from himself, but determines to get acquainted with himself as he really is." - Norman Vincent Peale

Tuesday, May 5, 2009

Because My Brother's Needing Me To Update The Blog So He Can Read It At Work

T: "I'm back, Blogland!"
J'hontaivius: "But I will be the one telling you what the fuck's happened so far..."

We haven't been properly introduced; I'm 'J'hontaivius J.' the more free-spirited side of Terrence....ya boy's been goin thru sum shit & been trippin' bout bloggin bout it, talkin' about "I don't wanna put myself out there!" and redundant shit like that. I really don't give a fuck what his ass does as long as I get my muthafuckin' nut ya feel me? I'm trying to get this bitch nigga laid and paid and he wanna be all good n shit! What the fuck's up wit that?!

T: "Can you please not write such filth about me? That's libel, JJ."
J'hontaivius: "Nigga who lyin wit yo wack ass?"
T: "Can I start the catching-up process now, sir?"
J'hontaivius: "Yea whatever but hurry up I'm fucking hungry-er than a bitch....!"
T: "Thank you so much for understanding."

Pardon the interruption; he's a character, that persona of mine. Now, back to my previous statement: I'm back! And it feels great to say so. So much has happened since the last true post. So let's begin - and I will attempt to make it brief [as if I could].

So I'm still living at the Big House with the GPs and am actually loving it (for the time being). I have a room, a private bath, and get at least 3-4 hot meals a week, its rent free and I only have to contribute to the basic essentials of groceries (eggs, milk, cheese, and cereal). However I do not have any privacy, total disregard of my 'grown-man status,' and get whispered about at the dining room table. The GPs just want me to get it back together and be happy; meaning save money and move out. I miss the wonders of watching TV naked, wrapped in a sheet on my couch with a bowl of Frosted Flakes and cartoons on. My father has strategically gotten an RV onto the property; so now I have the pleasure of him consistently inquiring about my life and who's in it, asking to borrow clothes and condoms, and getting water all over my bathroom during his showers.

I got a second job at another hotel. Its part-time, but its at the Holiday Inn Express and that's cool because of the pay raise. This check'll pay AT&T because of my high mobile phone bill. Is $167 a month too much? Apparently they don't think so; but I love unlimited everything! I should consider downsizing my plan, but when you run a business and are also a socialite, its hard to be out of touch. Gotta have my Blackberry, baby!

Now, about the Love Life:
** "The Definition" and I are slowly fizzling. Meaning the pop and sizzle is officially on simmer. I think he's a great person with a beautiful spirit, but let me inform you of the catalyst of why we're not as poppin' as we were - "The Definition" got into a verbal altercation with a superior not in his chain of responsibility at his job, and the ending result: he quit his job. In the midst of a recession. He quit his job. Now he informed me of what happened and everything and I was in total supportive mode, but here's the tiny tidbit that sent me reeling: When he's down, he's down and nobody can help. He doesn't want to see me, call me, whatever....but this dude will text. I'm ready to just say, "I care about you and what you're going through, but I feel you pushed me away, and I don't like that." Also we have trust issues....notice the WE there. So maybe I should just call it off to save face. Because until we were star-crossed from the beginning....
** "Freeze" and I are progressing. We're at that space where it seems someone's losing interest, but in fact, we're both just so busy that we forget to communicate the obvious thoughts we may be thinking. He asked me to be his boyfriend two weeks ago....I told him I will give him an answer one day.....when you don't live 4, 321 miles away. Please tell me this is a waste of time.

J'hontaivius: "This nigga aint telling y'all every muthafuckin thang..."
T: "I'm getting there, Taye, dang!"

[I really don't like him sometimes.]

Okay, so you know my philosophy regarding love: I take applications and conduct interviews, and weed out candidates who don't meet the qualifications. I mean, is that not the premise of dating? To interview for the long-term deal? So the weekend of April 24th, I called my good friend J.B. to surprise visit him and such in the great city of Huntsville, Alabama.....right. I get off work and get right onto 24 West and head to good ol' Alabama. I hadn't been to Huntsville since June 2007 when....(there's a story and a wound I'm not ready to divulge). So after the initial greetings and catching-up, J.B. and I head out to the club - which was a shack. I mean, its a literal hole in the wall, but the DJ had it rocking! After being introduced and scoping the scene, I made a beeline for the bar. The bartender proceeded to inform me that they were working with limited choices of spirits, so I had to reluctantly consume bottom shelf choices. As I was drinking this concoction the bartender suggested [named a Purple something....and tasted similar to syrup of black draught!] I was taking in the room and looking at the other patrons of said rainbow shack, and other by the door standing reserved, silent, and mellow was him. Let's not even give him a nickname yet.....I did not approach him, I continued to take in my surroundings and drink this liquid crack I paid $6 dollars for I knew was going to assist with my getting buzzed. Because men of class do not get drunk. [....insert devilish laughter here.] The night progressed; I sipped, I danced, I walked it out, and I randomly kissed a girl - still trying to figure out the details behind THAT, but at the end of the night, him and I did strike up conversation & and exchange numbers. We agree to get together to bask in the ambiance of Mary Jane and pancakes. We've been consistently chatting via phone and text ever since; and he's seen me twice since then - including the dinner date I surprised him with on Cinco De Mayo. I made my famous fai-jatas. Ole! We're feeling the vibe and it's refreshing to be mentally naked with someone....I love when you can get the b/s in the open. He's aware of the other suitors and I told him about my venture into blogging. [Hence whereas why I won't give him a nickname, yet - I want him to know that his "identity" is safe, as blogging is new to him.]

Nothing else has really happened, so I guess you're all caught up....well, a tryst or two has occurred, but nothing major resulted. Now I am ready to decide what to do regarding all these different parties getting involved. I am not going to continue balancing time, as I desire to be in a relationship. But I won't rush it. So stay tuned! Because this moment will eventually be mine.

P.S. I'm learning how to blog from the BlackBerry, so I'm gonna try to keep you and myself up to date :)