These flaws I've got, they're all part of who I am....Take me or not, but I finally understand....





I know that I'm not perfect, but who are you to be putting pressure on me....

Five flaws of mine that I'm cool with....for the most part.

Keep in mind that this is not a comprehensive list. If it's not on the list, that does NOT mean that I think I am perfect in that regard. So no need for some of my more charming anonymous commenters to chime in with some other perceived flaws of mine that aren't on the list. If they aren't there, maybe that means that it's a flaw that I'm aware of but am not OK with. Or it just didn't make the cut. Just a thought.

1. I procrastinate. A lot. But I seem to have a very sharp ability to calculate exactly how much time it will really take me to do something, and do it properly, and I manage not to procrastinate beyond that point, so everything still ends up getting done. But this is a dangerous flaw because when I make these calculations, I allow no room for error, so if something unexpected comes up, I would be screwed. So far this hasn't really happened (or if it does, the only thing I lose is some sleep), but theoretically, it could. 
2. I don't eat enough vegetables. And I don't eat all-natural, or grain-free, or any of those other things. But I eat pretty well, and I'm losing weight steadily, and I eat some vegetables, and I take my vitamins. So I'm OK with this. Could I get better? Yes. Is it a top priority for me right now? No. Sorry.
3. I'm lazy. This probably ties in to the procrastination thing. I don't like to get up to get a drink when I'm comfortable on the couch. I often don't feel like cooking dinner. I put off things that I don't feel like doing. But, I'm not lazy to the point of letting things go completely. The house is relatively clean, I eventually do get off my ass and make dinner... it'll all get done. But yeah, T suffers from this because he ends up bringing me a lot of glasses of water/juice/drinks/chips/salsa/ice cream. But I'm OK with that because I will also get out of bed in the middle of the night and bring him a glass of water if he wants one. So it all evens out.
4. I am defensive. My immediate reaction to criticism is to assume that the person criticizing me is wrong, or doesn't understand the full picture. The reason I'm OK with this flaw is that if the criticism is legitimate, I usually come around to it eventually. After that initial snappy reaction, I will think about what's been said and decide if it holds merit or not. That's my saving grace in this situation for sure.
5. I'm too laid back about some things. Sometimes this is a great thing but sometimes it gets me into trouble. My default assumption is that everything is fine. The problem is that I'm almost always right so in those times when everything isn't fine, I often don't find out right away. I assume that every cold and other sickness is fine and will go away on its own. I assume that every little problem is no big deal...I still think it's better to sometimes underestimate an issue than to constantly freak out about every little thing, however.

Moments Missed In My Absence

Trip To San Francisco, CA

At a party, being the Honorary Cook

From training in Cali

New Year's Eve 2010 in Atlanta

A Night Off...Try A Year

We're back!

Well, I'm back....me....T.

I know, I know, I know - the last time I posted was literally last summer, and I regret my super denial of the blog, but blogging takes discipline; a discipline I had to develop with time. So I think I can do consistently now, having need of a space where I can air my dirty laundry.

So within the year I will simply list the occurrences that have changed me for better and for worse:

1. Mom and Sister have their OWN PLACE - like, its HERS! I could not be happier! --- until I went to my storage unit one day and saw they used my two bedrooms to replace their own. So now all I have in storage is a couch, clothes, and a microwave. DO YOU SEE HOW SEE DO ME?
2. I've managed to acknowledge Jhontaivius' existence within me and I have acted on his desires without allowing him to fully take over, thus keeping me out of trouble. Except for when he wanted to go to this bathhouse....couldn't fight 'em that time....
3. I have abstained from fuckery for quite a few months, since the diagnosis of a good friend jolted me into a reality I've never know. People, please get tested regularly!
4. I'm in a state we have come to know as love -- remember ** The Definition ** - and after not taking each other seriously for a year, I'm relocating to see what we could be. But we're still not dating exclusively. Are we? I mean, we haven't said it.
5. I'm on Twitter now: follow me! And if you're not on Twitter, what the f**k are you doing in your spare time?

So to anyone reading and everyone who's stumbled upon this blog, prepare for the laughs to return....it's on.

No Arrrrrr, No Arrrrrr

You remember when you first heard this song?

What did you think of it? Everyone has a different interpretation of what Jordin Sparks' "No Air" means to them. My thoughts and feelings are no different. It is one of THOSE songs - those songs that force you to reminisce, reflect, and revel in the now and then moments of love. Realistically this could very well be the title sequence to my forever-in-production reality show entitled 'My Life.'

Does this song remind me of anyone in particular? Yes. As music does, it associates itself with where we are in life, and in most instances - with who. I know I'm not the only person who has songs that can send my mind and heart spiraling back to two or three years ago and recall the exact moment in detail. Damn you, emblazoned magic moments of love.....or something similiar.

Until the sun next leaves footprints upon the horizon.....this moment is mine. "T"

This One [Crying Like A Child]

*Press 'Play,' take a breath, let the song load - then begin reading the truth about "The One" who had me crying like a child that fateful June day in 2008...

We met in person through a mutual friend, and after having spent one wonderful evening together - you won me over with your fine cooking and some wonderful music. Your food warmed my soul, your musical taste/selections touched my heart; your mere presence and company put me on a high I have never been on before, and the passion we shared with one another made my heart skip a beat and left me speechless. I don't even remember the ride home that morning. You had me that bad. I feel that I had waited my whole life for that one evening. You have been in my dreams my whole life. I wish you would have given me a chance.

I have a picture of you that I keep close by. Also I don't let my Valentine's Day 2008 gift stray too far. (I named it after you). I look at them quite often and wonder why everything in my life that is too good to be true, actually is too good to be true. Our feelings for one another grew very very strong very fast. It kind of scared the two of us. I would like to think that our being scared is a smaller part of a larger plan.

You have other things going on in your life right now that don't allow for a relationship as of now. However, I feel that when I think of you so strongly and so often that there is something worth holding on to and going after. I am not going to give up. You are worth the wait, worth fighting for, and definitely worth having in my life regardless of any consequences on my behalf. I have never in my life wanted any one person in my life so badly as I do you. I hope you can appreciate that there is someone out there (me) that wants to be with you for all of the right reasons. You just have to give me a chance.

I don't care that we have known one another for such a short time. I cannot help how I feel or what makes me tick. There is so much that I have wanted to tell you, but resisted for fear of scaring you off, as this heavy of emotion is questionably too soon. If you read this, at least you now know that you have someone that aches to be with you only to make you the happiest man in the world that could love you unconditionally till the very end. Not to be vein, but I know I could be such a person to you, if you would just give me a chance.

I know that we both feel something for one another. I cannot get your voice out of my head, your face out of my mind, and I can't find that piece of my heart that is missing.....cause you have it. I never imagined anything like this being so hard. It kills me to know that you are so close and that I can't have you. I am obviously a wreck over you, and being smitten over you would be a gross understatement. Nothing I could ever say or do will ever be able to speak as loud as my heart does for you. I BEG of you, please don't forget me. I can't help but to follow my heart, and you are what my heart is after.

Dammit,........ I just can't quit you. I deserve a chance with you.

Sex Is Overrated....

....says the dude who's been getting his study on consistently for about two weeks! I don't know what to make of this desire that's been washing over men to request to give me face....but I thank you. I am so much more open to the receiving of fellatio. I can get that behind my desk at the hotel...not that I have. This month.

Why am I having the "orgel fantasia" dreams again....? [Don't even ask! I'm going to make a video to explain this.] [As soon as I figure out how to work this damn webcam.]

And if you haven't noticed, I'm trying to be more open and honest here at "This Moment Is Mine." I mean, I'm not revealing everything - but you certainly will be pulled in. And out. In. And out.

Get me a hot towel. Clean up on Aisle 7.